Teddy Pig's Guide To Excruciatingly Painful Basic Leather Protocol

Outside Looking In

I have gone over the way to dress in Leather and the general concepts of a Leather Relationship. This last part details the public side of Gay Male BDSM and the type of Leather Protocol you will most likely come into contact with on a day-to-day basis. It is probably the most important way you will communicate and recognize other serious individuals in Leather and the way you will start learning all this stuff I'm talking about for "real".

Leather In A Non-Consensual World

Leathermen define the masculine extreme but they also include the rigid disciplinarian or militaristic aspects of masculinity, which sets them apart from other Gay cultures. It is in some aspects a rebellion of subversion in that regard. Leather Protocol reflects this especially in the public forms of interaction.

Respect the public! No "full Leather" during the day and only with others in the Leather Scene. Don't frighten the old ladies by flagrant displays! It's non-consensual to everyone not in the Leather Scene.

Don't Touch! Don't Touch another person without their expressed permission. Don't tweak their nipples, Don't grab their ass, Don't fondle someone’s crotch, Don’t caress them anywhere without explicit consent. It's non-consensual; it's rude, and very wrong!

Leather Scenes are not a place for heavy drug and alcohol use. Make sure all parties are consensually involved in all activities taking place meaning also that they are reasonably sober.

Sharing Experience With Respect

Then there is the area of Leather Protocol that I have greatly ignored by writing this guide, but I understand it's main concepts and agree with them. This includes the discussion and sharing of experience, "how to's" and giving technical details of things like suspension and bondage that are dangerous and risky. Most importantly YOU need to understand right away about protecting everyone’s involvement from the public, in other words "Respect peoples privacy first and foremost."

Men in the Leather Scene do not discuss or write about the Leather Scene for outsiders.

Leather Protocol is not taught or explained to anyone except by example.

Leather Scene technical information is only shared among peers.

Showing You Are Ready

The very last part of this guide; I will go over your public actions and the forms they take when initiating contact with a Top or bottom and what it will entail. This is a Basic Leather Protocol guide so I'm gonna be very brief here, since many aspects should already be apparent to you, but this is probably what you were looking for when you started reading this. I simply wanted you to get the most common information out of the way before jumping in feet first.

ALWAYS call someone you identify or KNOW is a Top... "Sir" No exceptions!
Make sure you are always aware of who you are talking to and if you pick up that they are a Top immediately recognize this by calling them "Sir". Mistakes are always made in a crowed public space, it is a sign of experience in the way YOU go about correcting yourself as a bottom.

The more submissive a bottom is or would like to be with a particular Top, the less direct eye contact YOU make. Frequently stare at the Tops boots, less so in non-sexual conversations.

The more dominant a Top is or would like to be with a particular bottom, the more direct eye contact is made. Unless there is NO sexual interest. Here's a BIG HINT, you can do this in public with a Top that has a bottom right next to him in a position of submission and even a collar and it is entirely acceptable.
But... I would strongly recommend that you talk to and include the, in this case "senior" bottom, and introduce yourself.

Tops should always have the first opportunity to make contact with a bottom; they get the first and second moves by default.

It is up to the Top or the experienced bottom to extend a hand to invite a handshake. Remember no touching? Even here it is highly formal.

Formal Standing For Bottoms
bottoms do have ways of standing in Formal Leather and most of all this will be taught to you by the Top but since you are currently looking I will go ahead and give the basics here...

At Attention or Formal Present: the bottom stands upright, with feet spread shoulder wide, arms locked behind his back, each hand clasping the opposite forearm, or wrist; the chest is held out, the head may be bowed or held up however the eyes look down. This is usually done when initial introductions are occurring between Tops.

At Ease or Parade Rest: The same as the Formal Present except that the hands are left open and the left is placed into the right, above the ass crack. This is done when standing behind and to the left of your Top at the bar or when he is seated; unless he allows you to sit.

When walking together, bottoms walk half-a-step behind and to the left of your Top. The bottom should be close enough to be able to put his fingers in the Tops back pocket. The reason is simple, the Top wants to know immediately if you are separated or being bothered so always remain in his peripheral vision.

In closing this section let’s get to the point; these actions are about focus, not physical gymnastics. Who are YOU focused on and what do YOU want your actions to say? To honestly pull this off in a natural flowing way that does not look awkward and retarded... YOU have got to believe in what YOU are doing. Nothing I am telling you here will make you good at being a Leather Anything if you do not believe in what you have chosen to do in your heart and in your mind.

That’s all I’ve got to say.

Table of Contents:
Breaking Silence
Wearing Yourself Out
Belonging
Outside Looking In
The Drawing Of The Line

Back To The Main Page